The Bard

S.W.Thompson · The Bard

I have a lot of stories to tell.
they’ve been collected over the years
recited at random to anyone interested
or at least feigning interest
and they often reflect life
in as interesting a way as I can shape it.
some of the stories
are adventures or anecdotes
which are worthy of their re-telling.
most are just amusing turns
of what could otherwise be
a perfectly boring page.
I developed some gift
for capturing the audience’s attention
by force of will
or command of presence
and I can turn many nothings
into interesting somethings
but I don’t really know how.
it isn’t an intentional choice.
I think I just get bored
telling people boring things
so I choose to find
and isolate
or expand on
whatever parts of an ordinary day
could be considered interesting
and I give those moments life.
if the story is well received
I bring it back with another breath
to the next person patient enough
to listen to my yarn.
refine, refine, refine
until the story is worth telling
and then… the trick is not to tell it.
don't lead with the good stuff.
let someone else bring it up
set the stage for me
hype the story to get others invested
without having to say a thing.
decline the requests
to build the anticipation
then acquiesce, give in, tell the tale.
even if the story isn’t good
after however many years
or impromptu re-tellings
people want to know more.
that allows an introvert like me
to become comfortable in a crowd.
I can use the stories
to become the center of attention
not because I want to be
but so I can comfortably deflect
all the unwanted attention
from the awkward guy
not talking to anyone
to become the charming guy
with the interesting stories.
stories shape and lead a conversation
down any path the storyteller wants.
most of my life experiences
have lent themselves to finding a path
either in or out
of any conversation
at any time
and prevent me from having to suffer
through too much social anxiety.
from theatre to poetry to authorship
motorcycling to martial arts to whiskey
or waiting tables to sales to Scrum,
I’ve tried to learn and experience
a little bit about everything
to make talking to people easier.
there is no doubt in my mind
I could walk into a room with anyone
find something they were interested in
that I could tell a story about
so I wouldn’t have to talk to them
about nothing.
no weather chats,
no “nice day, huh?”
no “so what do you do?”
not that those don’t come up
but they become so easy to deflect
when you collect stories
that when someone asks
“how are you?”
I can reply with something like:
“so far so good…
I went to the store today
saw someone without their mask
and wondered what would happen
when they tried to check out.
turns out nothing.
stood behind them in line
not one word.
it reminded me of a time when…”
then they story is mine.
no more chit-chat.
just connection and deflection
to avoid saying:
“good, you?”
then standing in silence
hoping for a way to retreat.
stories give me freedom.
I don’t have to be me.
I just have to be a bard.
performing on a small stage
not for pay or profit.
just to feel comfortable
in my own skin.